Short hair… Don’t care!

So I never thought I would be writing a blog post titled Short hair… Don’t care! on here.

As you all know a lot of my content is law related, whether my own career, study tips, legal news, events, tips for lawyers and law firms growing their online presence etc.  So why a blog post called Short hair… Don’t care!?  Well, after a little incident on the train the other night, I need to have a little rant.

On Friday night I was on the tube in London and there was a mum and her little boy and girl. The little girl looked at me, then to her mum, and said “that girl has really cool hair”, to which her mum replied, “You don’t want to look like that, she looks like a lesbian. Only girls who are lesbians have short hair, boys don’t ever fancy girls with short hair”.

Thanks for making all of these comments loud enough that I could hear you.  It took all the willpower I had in me to not correct you.  I am not an argumentative person and I am not someone who would ever speak out of turn, or make a scene, however, your comments are completely unnecessary.

Short hair... Don't care! Click To Tweet

To the lady on the train, for the record, and not that it is any of your business, but I am not a lesbian.  I have short hair because I want to have short hair, and I like how it looks.  Oh, and I have been in relationships, so clearly guys do like girls with short hair.  Yes, not every girl has super short hair like me, but I don’t care.  If anything I like looking a little bit different.

I have always had short hair, various forms of short hair.  From a bob, to a super short pixie cut, I change it up as often as I want to.  I have a long fringe at times, then like recently, I cut the long fringe off.  I also have it undercut.  It doesn’t make me a boy and it also doesn’t make me a lesbian.

Last time I checked my hair hasn’t impacted on my education, my career, my relationships, my family or friends etc.  I have a law degree, I run a blog, I speak at universities and to rooms full of law students, I speak at conferences and events all over the world, I have worked in law firms whilst studying to become a barrister, oh and my family and friends don’t seem to be bothered by my short hair.

Also, and this might shock you, but there are lesbians with long hair.  So assuming someone’s sexuality based on their hair cut is properly a bad idea.

For the record, whilst some guys might not like girls with short hair, some do.  My short hair doesn’t make me any less of a girl.  It should go without saying that different people like their partners (whatever sexuality) for various reasons, everyone has their own type.

One final thing, lady on the train – whilst we are on the subject of me having short hair, I don’t care what you or anyone else thinks of it.  Yes I have written this post, but not because your comments upset or hurt me, but because we live in the 21st century and assumptions like the one you made are completely unwarranted and unnecessary.  So as the title suggests, Short hair… Don’t care!

Plus, and whilst I would never ever tell anyone how to raise their children, you are potentially raising children that think it okay to judge someone and assume someone’s sexuality based on their hair style.  You might also deter your own child when she is an adult from having short hair for fear of “looking like a lesbian”.  So please stop.

As a grown up with short hair, I have never really experienced the “oh, she’s definitely a lesbian’ thing, thankfully! Yes I did a lot at school, but that was over 10 years ago, and whilst it was not nice or warranted then, I just got on with it.  However, I am now 26 and I don’t need you telling other people on a train what you believe my sexuality to be, straight or gay.  It isn’t any of your business, and quite frankly it never will be.

Rebecca x

 

 

YouTube Videos Round Up

YouTube Videos Round Up

Why have I written a YouTube videos round up post?

Well… I am really enjoying filming some new content and videos for my YouTube channel and if you read my blog you will know I recently uploaded a post and video titled ‘Where have I been?’.  This blog and video discussed my plans for my YouTube channel going forward and what content I will be sharing.  The content will be for law students and lawyers, so keep an eye out.

In the meantime I thought I would do a quick round up of some of the videos I have uploaded so far.  Every link will open in a new tab, so you can watch the video with ease and then come back to this post.

What is Lawyer In The Making?

When I first gave me blog a design overhaul (quite a few years ago), I decided I wanted a short video explaining what you could expect from my blog.  I still love and use this video (even if it looks a little old now) plus I was determined to make sure the butterfly made it in to the video.

My Q&A Video

I pulled together a few of the frequently asked questions I receive on a regular basis, and answered them in a YouTube video.  This video is what sparked further videos being created, seeing as you liked this one so much, and gave me such lovely feedback.   I cover frequently asked questions about my career, my blog and why I blog!

My new promo video

This is my new promo video, it contains me answering a couple of the frequently asked questions that I covered in my Q&A video.  It is great to use at events or just to share with people if they want a quick overview of what this blog is about!

Does LinkedIn Still Work?

I believe it still has a massive role to play in terms of online engagement for lawyers and law students.   See my thoughts here.

25 Random Facts About Me

This video helps you get to know me (the girl behind the blog) a little bit better.  I always try and keep my content personal but professional.  I keep my private life private, but always try and be approachable and friendly in the content I share, as well as honest.  This video gives you a little insight into the things I love, my upbringing, the sorts of holidays I love and what I get up to in my spare time.  As well as my love for Costa Hot Chocolate and crime/law related box-sets.

Stressing About Advocacy?

Public speaking does not always come naturally to us.  Getting up and speaking in front of your class, or even in an advocacy task can be daunting.  Here are 4 basic tips to help calm those nerves and make you feel more confident.

Stressing about advocacy, here are 4 tips to help you… Click To Tweet

Get in the Lawyer Mindset | Attend Legal Events

If you follow me on any of my social media platforms (or read my blog regularly) then you will know I am a massive advocate of law students attending legal events.  Whether that is a seminar on a legal topic of interest, a public lecture, a conference – it is really important you try as law students attend some.  Watch more on this here.

How do you follow up with people after an event?

In this video I share some of my top tips for following up with people you have met at events.  Whether they told you to email them, or send across a CV etc.  here are my tips for ensuring you do it well!

Law Students | How to use Twitter like a pro

If you have been following me for a while, then you will know that Twitter is my go to platform for all things law.  It is the one I recommend law students and lawyers use, whether for research, news or engagement.  I pulled together some of my top tips for law students, on how to use twitter like a pro – check it out here.  Oh and I guess I can shamelessly plug my own twitter here, so give me a follow!

5 Top Tips For Using Twitter (Law Firms)

This video contains 5 very simple tips to help you use twitter better.  The content isn’t just applicable to law firms though, they are useful for tips for lawyers and law students.

5 Further Tips For Using Twitter 

In the interests of you, I didn’t want to make a stupidly long video (no one has time to watch that right?) so here are 5 further twitter tips!

My 2017 Law School Mission

You will see from my tweets that I find it really frustrating when law schools aren’t utilising social media or their websites properly.  It is great way to engage better with their current students, other law schools and potential students.  Check out my 2017 law School mission here.

Are you having problems at University?

Studying law can at times be challenging and you shouldn’t have to suffer alone.  Equally if you are having problems at university or at home and these things are impacting on your studies then you need to speak to someone.  Speaking to someone at your university can help get the problem resolved a lot quicker, even if it is just some additional support, a deadline extension or an acknowledgement that the fact the heating is never on will be looked into! Watch this video here.

I hope you enjoying checking out my YouTube Videos Round Up, and don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel whilst you are on one of my videos. Alternatively click here and then subscribe.  It just means you never miss an new video.

Should I create another YouTube Videos Round Up post in six months time?

Rebecca x

YouTube | Where have I been?

Where have I been?

So, where have I been? Here, there and everywhere it feels like.  But, I’m not talking about destinations in this post, I have been so quiet over on YouTube and I wanted to let you know that’s all about to change.

I filmed this quick video to explain where I have been, and what you can expect going forward!

What can you expect on my Lawyer In The Making YouTube channel?

If you watch my video you will see that I do want to keep the content tailored to both audiences.  So content for law students, but also content for lawyers and those working in the legal profession.  I am hoping that some videos will sit nicely between the two, but I am also very aware that not all the content will do that.

What can you do?

So of course I would love it if you subscribe to my YouTube channel, it just means that you will never miss a video!  You can subscribe by going onto my YouTube and hitting the subscribe button.  Equally, likes and comments are always appreciated on my videos.  Plus if you like what you see on my YouTube channel, then share a link from it to social media or with people you think will like it.

More important than that though, I would love to know what you want me to film and share.  I have a big list of topics and things I want to talk about and share, and this list I have generated myself and from conversations an discussions with people in person and online – but, I want to know what you want!

So make sure that you send me messages on social media, that you comment on my videos or that you email me with what you want.

I want to be producing content that is of interest to you, but also a benefit – so what do you want to see or learn about?

Rebecca x

Opinion – Am I A Victim?

Am I a victim? On paper, and by definition, yes I am.  Do I think I am one though? No.

Am I a victim? Click To Tweet

Yet when I look at my life and the way I react to and feel in certain situations, then that incident, 13 years ago this month, has massively impacted on my life.

13 years ago this month I was sexually assaulted on a train, heading home from school  on a Friday night.  I was sat on the train with my little sister, she had just started Year 7 and we had just returned to school after the summer holiday that week.  We occupied a set of seats on the old style metropolitan train.  Across the aisle on the smaller pair of seats was another girl from our school who had just started year 7.

The train journey itself lasted 10 minutes maximum. We got off on the 4th stop.  However, this particular Friday, the doors stayed open at Rayners Lane for a little longer than normal, which wasn’t out of the ordinary.  The doors closed, then re-opened, as they re-opened a group of boys/guys/men jumped on the train.  I would be lying to say I didn’t feel relieved when they walked by my little sister and I.  Plus we were now on our way to our stop, so nothing bad was going to happen in the short time frame!

However, they soon turned around and came and sat amongst us.  I remember someone sitting next to me on each side, one by my little sister, and open opposite the girl from school I didn’t know.  A couple of them were standing in the walkway.

Time seemed to stop still, I was sexually assaulted on that short train journey home, and was appalled that the adults stood in the middle section with the pole bit, who could clearly see us didn’t step in to help.  I was adamant that they were in no circumstances going to touch my sister or the other girl.  As it approached our stop, I made sure the girl got off with us, and that evening my dad was picking us up from the station and I made her drop the girl off where she had planned to meet her mum.  I would never have lived with myself if I had left her on the train with them.

What followed then was an evening of trying to remember and write down everything, police visits, a trip to the hospital, buying a new school blazer and skirt, over the next few weeks various trips to the police station,and for a little while an undercover police officer walking near us on the way to school and the train journey.

So am I victim?

I guess I am, but I don’t spend my time thinking about what happened, and this is the first time I have ever written about it, plus hardly anyone knows this about me.

Yet, everyday I am impacted by what happened that day.  I am so anxious on public transport, I would rather stand than sit down, I am super anxious if there are relatively empty carriages, I used to dread coming home later on at night if drunk people were on the train, I hate carparks day or night, I hate getting taxis/cabs, I don’t like walking around in the dark (and sometimes even the day).  I check around my car before getting into it, and then have to reach around the back of my seat just to make sure I am safe.  I triple check my front door is locked.  I am constantly scanning around when I am out and about, trying to remember what people near me are wearing, just incase something happens.  I don’t even think about doing that, it just happens.

Please don’t think I am crazy!

However, if you follow my blog or social media, you will know that I still do most of those things.  In DC I spent my life jumping in and out of cabs getting to conference venues and then after parties.  I get the train into London frequently (I used to do it everyday for work), I get the train home after I have seen friends, I even sit down sometimes on the train, I leave my car in carparks and return to my car etc. I sat and watched the sunset by myself down by Boston harbour and walked back to my hotel every night.

I refuse to not do these things even if they make me ridiculously anxious and uncomfortable.  Sometimes though my nerves do get the better of me.  I walk around anxious and paranoid more often than not.  I constantly think that the people around me might be potential attackers, and it is awful to think that about complete strangers, who 99.9% of the time are just innocently going about their day.

Sometimes it does all get a little bit much, and I had full blown anxiety attacks when I arrived in DC in 2016, to the point where I considered spending thousands of pounds on a flight home!

I know that everyone is relatively cautious when it comes to some of these things, and personal safety is paramount.  I do sometimes wonder whether I would have been like this anyways, even if I hadn’t been assaulted? Would I have always been a little bit extra paranoid? Maybe, maybe not.  I guess I will never know the answer to that.

I do sometimes wonder whether I would have been like this anyways, even if I hadn't been… Click To Tweet

One thing I do know is that my family and the police helped me massively through that period of my life.  At the age of 13 having to do police interviews and be subject to some pretty harsh questioning (by one particular women) was tough and knowing that people had my back made such a difference.   I also know that by reporting them, they maybe/hopefully wouldn’t do it again!

This post isn’t to get sympathy, this happened such a long time ago.  Please remember though, that every day you meet people and they all have stories from their… Click To Tweet Good and bad, they shape all of us and impact on our lives, even if we don’t disclose what or why.

Rebecca x

 

 

Throwback Week

Wow, this week really is a full on throwback week.  My Facebook and TimeHop keep reminding me of all the things I have been up to over the last few years and this week is a particularly good one.  So with that in mind, I thought I would share my throwback week, plus they are all law related (no surprise there then!).

Throwback Week | Number 1

Two years ago this week I graduated! Two years ago, where does the time go?

For me the whole graduation ceremony wasn’t high on my list of priorities and must do’s.  I was just pleased I could say I had my law degree.  It was something I had wanted since I was a little girl and I loved the entire process of studying.  You all know that I didn’t go to uni or study law as I had imagined I would.  However,  looking back I wouldn’t change anything.  I wouldn’t change where I am now for the world.

The only benefit for me for actually going to my graduation ceremony was that I could show my family the photos.

Throwback Week | Number 2

I started the BPTC this time two years ago.  It was a really great week, graduation from my law degree and then embarking on the BPTC the same week.  It was the start of my one weekend a month training.

Don’t get me wrong though, studying one weekend a month isn’t as easy as it sounds. I loved studying the BPTC but when you are working a full time job (which isn’t full time 9-5 hours) and then blogging and freelance work it can be a lot.  I loved it though.  The only other thing with only having classes one weekend a month, is consistency.  You aren’t doing advocacy every week, or every fortnight.

Throwback Week | Number 3 – Boston Law Schools

This time last year I was in Boston, having the most amazing time.  I stayed at a lovely hotel, The Ames Boston (I highly recommend it) and I was fortunate enough to stay in one of their corner suite rooms and I had the most amazing views. The sunrises and sunsets every day were a particular highlight.

I got up to some amazing law related things whilst in Boston.  I had the pleasure of visiting 3 law schools, sitting in on classes, meeting professors and students etc.

Suffolk University Law School was the first one I visited, I had a brilliant day and the staff were so friendly and accommodating.  Plus the law school is in an amazing location.  Suffolk Law School was a stones throw from my hotel (so not too far from the waterfront and the shops/restaurants near Quincy’s Market).  It is also, right on the Common and surrounded by Freedom Trail landmarks.

Boston University School of Law.  Where do I start? The views over the river and town are simply stunning.  The facilities are amazing, and the staff and students welcoming! I had a brilliant day again, and really enjoyed my time here.

Harvard Law School.  This was my absolute dream, and short of studying at Harvard, I am so pleased I ticked this off.  Walking around, chatting to students and chatting to Harvard Law Alumni (as they had a big reunion dinner on the day I visited) was amazing.  The bookshop was a law geek’s dream. If I hadn’t had to fly onto Washington DC and then fly home, I would have bought more books! Plus they do have the most amazing collection of baby apparel… and I did have to buy myself a Harvard Law School hoody.

Throw Back | Number 3 – Exploring Boston

I of course spent time exploring Boston and areas including Quincy Market and Faneuil Hall which was just down from my hotel.  Most days I managed to take a quick stroll around the Common, the cute bridges are a great spot to watch the world go by.  Newbury Street is a must, for all those who love a designer shop.  What I really loved most though was going for a wander, there are some beautiful houses and streets to admire.  These streets are littered with cute coffee shops and florists.  Plus you can’t forget the Freedom Trail, a must do, and it takes in some great places.

One of my highlights had to be going down to the waterfront on evenings when I had no plans, grabbing a drink from Starbucks and just watching the sunset across the water.  Watching the world go by, whilst I worked or blogged was a highlight and I am a sucker for a sunset.  Thankfully it was only a short walk back to my hotel.

Some other must do’s if you are in Boston include; whale watching, the USS Constitution and Bunker Hill, checking out the various stops on the Old Town Trollies (a great way to check out the sights), a sunset cruise (a must do, the views of the Boston skyline as the sun sets will not disappoint, plus hearing the cannon go off by the USS Constitution is amazing) and also watching the Boston Red Sox play the New York Yankees at Fenway Park.

Rebecca x